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12:01 p.m. - 2004-09-08
No Boys Allowed...
No Boys Allowed…

I try to avoid being one of those bitter, resentful women who blames all of her problems on the male species. However, sometimes, men are just so fucking retarded that it's all you can do to maintain your sanity.

As I am sure you've figured out, there is one particular man who is pissing me the hell off right at the moment. This guy I'm dating, in other words. Let's call him "GID," which is more polite than "Fucking Immature Asshole." Anyway, I went out of town to visit my mother over Labor Day weekend. She had just moved, and needed help unpacking. I had not seen her since Christmas. GID has (another) new job, and this time, he's working from 3:30 pm to 12:30 am. He does have Friday and Saturday off, but other than a quick dinner on his lunch break, he really can't hang out during the week. (I've always been an 8-ish to 5-ish kinda girl, myself.) Therefore, he EXPECTS me to hang out with him each and every Saturday.

So anyway, when I break the news about going out of town, he starts in on this "I will miss you" bullshit. Keep in mind that I've been dating him for a while and we NEVER see each other more than twice a week, and I did have dinner with him Wednesday. While I'm gone, he sends one e-mail that basically says "I have nothing to say except I miss you." I get back, e-mail him, details about the trip, yada yada. He e-mails me back with more of the "I miss you" shit, a few minor work schedule details, and says we can go to dinner Thursday. I e-mail back to ask him if he's still taking lunch at 7:30…and get a snarky little reply about how I never tell him I miss him or anything, but that's what he expects.

Let me back up for a minute here. The last three or four times I've hung out with him, he really doesn't talk to me. And he doesn't always want to have sex, either….it has to be his idea. Actually, pretty much anything we do has to be his idea, or he acts like a whiny pain in the ass and makes sure I don't enjoy whatever it is either. Further, I make more money, am more intelligent, and do not live with my parent(s). I'm sure that at some level, he's threatened by all of this, and that's the reason for the pathetic attempts to control me.

On with the story. I spend several hours at work composing an e-mail detailing what my problems are with all this crap. I send it. He had likely left for work by then, but I have yet to receive a reply. More control shit.

At this point, I don't know whether to expect a shitty, defensive e-mail detailing every single fault I have, or whether to expect a contrite "don't leave me" e-mail. What I would really appreciate is him opening a dialogue about these issues, but I'm afraid that's too much to hope for….and I wouldn't have to send e-mails like the one I did send if he would open his mouth and communicate like a grown-up.

Then, there's the guy I was hanging out with….more of just a friend with benefits, but I did actually like him a lot…it seemed like I'd been the one doing a lot of the calling, and it was his turn. I haven't talked to him since July. While I realize we were not having some "serious" relationship, a phone call would be nice once in a while. If he's dating someone, or whatever, fine….but at least have the courtesy of telling me that. I don't know whether to be worried about him or pissed off. I want to call, or e-mail, but I'm stubborn that way. I have forwarded a few funny things to his e-mail, so I know it works and the mailbox isn't full….so he's checking it. Or someone is.

I am not trying to imply that all men are assholes. I'm not trying to imply that they are the root of all my problems. However, once in a while…I would just like them to do something that doesn't piss me off.



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