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10:54 p.m. - 2004-12-16
Getting My Elaborate On, After I Talk a Little About My Pets
My cat has been a giant pain in the ass for the last two days. This would be Maggie, my little black cat (with a few white spots). She's knocked the phone off the hook, meowed loudly at every opportunity, encouraged me to fill her already full food and water dishes, started licking my hand while I was trying to type last night's entry, and is currently sitting on top of the computer (which is on the floor), just waiting for another chance to get in my way. Here's Maggie, in a rare quiet moment.

Sissy, my siamese-like cat, hasn't been much better. She's taken to guarding the toilet. As in, she perches on the closed lid and gives you the most pathetic, horrible, "I'm being tortured" meow when you move her ass. Now, my bathroom is tiny, really. And it has no counters. So in the morning/evening, when I'm trying to prepare myself for the day, my makeup bag, hairbrush, lotion, etc. must rest temporarily on the toilet seat for easy access. Realizing, of course, that putting on makeup, brushing hair and teeth, picking at chin zits, and otherwise primping requires the mirror, Sissy conveniently the front of the sink. The mirror is over the sink. It's not very big, either. Removing Sissy from this spot results in hissing. Here's Sissy, being all cute.

Emily, my third kitty, the fluffy fat one, has been flawless. She's all cute. She wants to be picked up and snuggled, or petted while I'm reading a book, or given the occasional kitty snacky. She is not loud...quite the opposite. She squeaks, or just opens her mouth without any sound coming out. And here is my Emily kitten.

Can we all tell that I'm totally not inspired? Good. (Heather knows what I mean.)

So, last night, I promised elaboration. Really, the only thing upon which I plan to elaborate is, as usual, diet and exercise.

I do appreciate all the kudos on my accomplishments thus far. The problem is, I still have a long, long way to go. I let myself get completely out of hand, and I'm now paying the price for that.

Anyway, as usual, America's Biggest Loser touched a few nerves. (If you're bored with this show...too bad. You should start watching it. Hehehe.) What really got me this time, though, were the contestants facing the life-size cardboard cutouts of themselves at the beginning of the show. Because seriously, right now, most of the people on the show have lost about what I have. And realizing how different they looked, even though they're not at their goals yet, made me dig out my "before" picture. Here it is. I wasn't going to post it, but really, they're worth 1000 words....and the people who read this and know me in "real life" have seen the real thing looking like this, so I've decided to get over my insecurity about it.

When I looked at this, and looked at a recent picture (which will follow), I realized that I HAVE gotten somewhere. I was starting to feel like I hadn't. I was starting to feel that what I had done really didn't make that much difference. I think that was the reason for my reacquaintance with junk food. I was thinking "I don't look that different." Well, I do. For the last two days, that picture has stopped me every time I thought about eating something unhealthy. Shit, my aunt sent me a big bag of chocolates, and I only ate two. (In moderation, chocolate is good for you.) I gave the rest away. Immediately. When I have been still hungry after some little bowl of low-fat soup or Lean Cuisine or salad, I've stopped.

Here's me now.

Just kidding. Couldn't resist. I mean, yeah, it's me, and all...but really, here it is.

I don't want to be all dorky and "EUREKA"-ish about this, because knowing me, I will backslide. I'm trying not to think that way anymore. I'm trying to remember that everything I do DOES matter....and that, by "cheating" on my diet, I'm really just cheating myself.

{Loopy steps down from soapbox gingerly, as so not to injure anything.}

I suppose that's all I really have to say tonight. I believe the Insomnia Fairy may at last be defeated by Mr. Sandman. I hope he clocks that bitch but good, too.



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