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1:49 p.m. - 2005-10-11
Graceful, Personified.
I am a complete klutz.

I was GOING to post more pictures of cat costumes, but unfortunately, I broke the cord to download from my camera. My camera is old, and instead of connecting via USB cable, it uses a serial port (at least I think that’s what the shit is called) and has a plug like a headphone jack on the other end. I went to plug it in, missed the hole, and broke the tip off.

Sounds painful, no?

Therefore, you must all be patient and wait for my new cord to arrive before you get more embarrassing photos.

Further, this week, I also managed to hit my arm on my office doorknob 80 gabillion times, fall over backwards in a chair (in front of an audience of co-workers who laughed until they cried), and land on my ass while attempting to do lunges or squats or plies or some such horseshit with one of those inflatable exercise ball thingies. (Read more about that in my guest entry, here.).

In other news, I have accepted the Swordsman’s 12-week challenge. Like him, I will be making a concerted effort to lose weight and improve my fitness level. Unlike him, I am making no pretensions of things like doing the dishes every day. I hate doing the dishes. That was my chore as a kid, because my brother was allegedly “too little” to go there. As soon as he reached an appropriate age, I lobbied fruitlessly for a switch. Now…I use paper plates or just ignore them until such time as it becomes impossible.

This challenge would be the reason for “the ball.” I had a training session at my gym. The trainer said I would get better results if I didn’t use the weight machines. I thought this meant barbells and stuff…not shit that looks deceptively easy and makes walking/sitting/standing today an effort. And Wednesday, she shows me the upper body workout. Assuming I can actually move enough after I do these things to get on a cardio machine, these exercises should be effective.

Since I don’t have any cat pictures, the least I can do is a survey that’s going around….thanks to Cat!

6 Things I Want To Do:

1. Chris Noth
2. Travel to Ireland, Amsterdam, Egypt, London, and Paris (for starters)
3. Publish a book
4. Weigh less than 200 lbs.
5. Actually RUN a mile
6. Quit smoking

6 Things I Can Do:

1. Spell
2. Bargain shop
3. Beat Jewel Quest
4. 45 minutes on the elliptical trainer
5. French braid my hair
6. Remember phone numbers

6 Things I Can’t Do:

1. Quit being sarcastic
2. Keep my house clean for longer than a week
3. Deal with stupid people
4. Walk in spiky heels
5. Stop reading so much
6. Watch sports without being bored

6 Things That Makes Me Attractive To The Opposite Sex:

1. My hair
2. My eyes
3. My intellect
4. My sense of humor
5. My mad sexual skillz
6. My car

6 Things I Say All The Time:

1. Give me a fucking break
2. Jesus Tap-Dancing Christ
3. Bitch, please
4. That sucks donkey balls and/or blows the goat ass
5. No
6. Yeah, right

6 Celebrity… Hmm… ’Crunches’…:

1. Chris Noth
2. Robert Sean Leonard
3. Billy Joel
4. George Clooney
5. George Michael
6. Taye Diggs

6 More Victims

1. Kiosh (Ha-HAH Mr. Taggypants!)
2. Andria
3. Jules
4. TickTrix
5. Smed
6. Dooki



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